It’s kind of like a mantra in my era of mom-hood to “do something for yourself.” To take a moment to pamper yourself, watch out for yourself, or have some time alone. I understand the need. It’s a good day if I can get about 30 seconds to go to the bathroom by myself. An even better day if I get to close the door. But, in all honesty, there is something I do for me every night. I snuggle my babies to sleep.
I know, I know. It’s against all the sleep rules. But let me tell you why I do it, and why, even when Norah was able to go to sleep on her own, I continued to do it. There’s nothing like a sleeping baby. Nothing like that sweet smell of a baby’s hair and their rhythmic breathing to blow away all the hardship and struggle of the day. Nothing like that peaceful innocence to remind me of the importance of savoring each moment that they’re little, each moment that I get to hold them. When I snuggle my babies to sleep, I get to reset with them – no matter the scuffles we encountered that day, I get to remember who they are as they drift off to dreamland. I get to stroke those chubby cheeks and wispy hair, to hold those *cough* dirty hands, and remember how beautiful and wondrous they are in the midst of their emotional pendulums. And I get to be good at being a mom – at singing them to sleep and watching them settle in with utmost peace and security.
Now, I totally recognize that this isn’t for everybody, and I’m not saying it should be. But for me, in this stage of our lives, it’s a significant part of who I am as a mom. I used to have a lot of guilt about it. You know, like i’m setting my kids up for bad sleep habits for the rest of their lives or something. But tonight as I lay there, holding both my kids, I made a New Years Resolution. I’m putting my foot down. Regardless of what anyone says, I will continue to snuggle my babies to sleep because I love it. And because I’m doing it for me.